The word frustration comes from the verb 'to frustrate', but the two words describe different things. The act of frustrating suggests that outside forces are at work, whilst the word frustration has more to do with feelings and sensations resulting from being frustrated. On a personal level, of course, one can be the outside force doing the frustrating and causing others to feel frustrated, but one can also be the one suffering frustration.
It's all to do with power or who has the power in any given situation. If one is doing the frustrating, then one is holding the balance of power, whilst if one is frustrated, one is made to feel powerless.
The consequences of holding power can be quite traumatic, sometimes on both parties. For instance, if a toddler's will to do or have something is frustrated by the parent, the result can be a tantrum of colossal proportions, causing embarrassment and humiliation; if a criminal is thwarted, there may be a violent response; and if a business man's goal is unfulfilled, he may seek retribution. Regardless of these responses, it is sometimes necessary to make such a stand.
In these and other cases, the reactions of such children or people indicate something about the personality of the person concerned and, whilst reactions may be less personally aggressive, there is no doubt that at the very least resentment will be felt towards the perpetrator and grudges may be held for years.
Frustration may, however, have an inanimate cause and the personality trait suggested in these cases may be due to a lack of patience, though the lack of efficiency or common sense by others may also be a cause.
Most of my own frustration comes from these causes. My computer, for instance, either wants to do too much for me or too little. It corrects my grammar or the numbering and placement of my paragraphs when I am perfectly happy with my script, but can't keep up with my typing speed and then misses out letters or words. The internet is far too slow in responding to my commands and Google has just changed my email page so that I can neither see what it says because the print is too pale and - well, it's just too complicated to explain! My mobile phone is another cause of frustration in that I never hear it when a message or a phone call comes in and then the sender complains that I haven't replied! I also expect people to know what I expect of them without having to spell it out. If a tradesman knows his job, why do I have to explain every detail of my problem to him or risk him making a hash of it? If someone visits an area because it is particularly beautiful, why do they mess it up by leaving litter all over the place? If I fall over my husband's shoes every time I go in the kitchen, why can't he put them away?
Most frustrations are trivial and relatively unimportant in the great scheme of things, but small irritations, disappointments and unfulfilled ambition can build up until they are out of all proportion to reality - and who knows where they might end.
Liz Reeve
28.1.12
Writing Group Exercise
